Sometimes I ask myself the question "Why write? Why write at all?"
It's a question that comes out from the dark places. The places I go to when things are not as intentional as I want them to be. Because, lets face it...I thrive on the intentional. I get energy, drive and life from inhaling an intention.
But even intentions get stale and become like bad morning breath that you can't seem to chase away.
So in those moments I ask myself why I do it at all... I know its a dumb question and I know I always and forever will be tripping over audible words in conversation only to quickly go and write it down and find myself there in the paragraphs all precise and clear.
But I have to ask.
And I always come back to.
I was made to be a word/story girl.
I know this.
It has come back to me again, and again.
After a book consumed, a new intention written down, a new story in progress, a new journal it all gives me the biggest rush that only a romance can give.
And thats it
I am in love with words and story. Head over heels, an addict really. I consume them like water in dessert.
I write because if I didn't, I would not be me. I would not be Amy Grace. Girl of intentional living with words and story as her harmony.
There are stacks and stacks of journals from age six onward that prove writing isn't just a hobby for me. Its a way of life. It is the way I find myself and reunite with my spirit and soul. Journals are not for the ones in denial, they cannot lie or tell a story a different way when things go different. Journals are the historical documentation of every idea, thought, dream, wish and attempt. These are the books that have helped me work through life one step at a time. And those gaps of times when I didn't write...when pages glare empty or a journal abandoned too early. Those are the markings of when I was in denial and recovery.
It is important to declare and remind ourselves of the reasons we do things.
Why do anything if we cannot reflect and find anew the intention behind our whys?
Whys are important.
If we can answer a 'why', we are giving ourselves and those around us a better version of us. An honest one.
I write because it is the part of me that always stays true. No matter what stage of life I am in, what other activities I do, what people are in my life , I will always be writing through those things.
I write, because somewhere inside of me, Amy Grace, is a heartbeat that lives for words and stories.
And right now my heart beats strong and healthy.