As children, we naturally live by our values.
We live emotionally open, follow our passions, explore new ideas, and ultimately seek connection with those we love and care for.
We don't fight or argue this with ourselves.
We simply do.
Why is this so hard to do as we grow up?
Our true sense of self and our true values become intertwined with expectations, societal norms, financial constraints and ultimately 'fears'.
Fear of not being taken seriously, fear of rejection, fear of missing out, fear of losing our value.
Yet…
How much value can we genuinely hold if we are not living to the true values of our inner selves?
Begin broadly.
What do you value in life as a whole?
Moving my body
Spending time with loved ones
Reading
Nature
Meaningful work
Eating well (both for health & enjoyment)
2. Categorize into daily, monthly, and seasonal values.
How do these values show up in your routine? Do you value reading every day or on the weekends? Do you want to be in nature once a week or just once a month? Do you have hobbies as values that may fit best into autumn? (Puzzles, dance class, baking?)
3. Expand.
Fill out your days, weeks, and seasonal categories. It helps to put all the possible values down and edit after. Often, we don’t know what we value or have as an expectation/routine for ourselves until we fully meditate on and see it all in front of us.
Other values could be: keeping up on chores, storytime with the kids, date nights, and getting to work on time.
4. Reflect and Edit
As you live out your daily/weekly values, edit along the way. See what's working and what isn't. Often we expect too much from ourselves and must be humble enough to realize we have bogged ourselves down with too many expectations, either from others or ourselves. Be realistic. How much can you fit in a day? How much can you honour during a week or month? And for what you value, you may find that you can move that value from a daily routine to something less often or vice versa. Enjoy learning about yourself along the way.
Maybe there is something you thought you valued that you don't. Perhaps you find that what you value during some parts of the year, you don't value other times. Maybe your values change depending on where you live, your job, etc. Be at peace with course correcting and making adjustments.
5. Lean into your values.
If you change them quarterly or monthly, let yourself enjoy the values you create and meditate on them daily.
*Some practical applications:
I keep a list of my daily, weekly, and seasonal (currently, it's Autumn) values in my notes app. I use it as a guide as I move throughout the day, week and month. I put a star beside the ones I have honoured, reminding me of the ones I have ignored or am realizing may not fit during this season of my life.
