Once upon a time I believed that in a yard full of three-leaf clovers there would be at least one four leaf clover.  

I believed that I could find it if I just tried.  Despite the lawn mower trimming them all down, despite the surplus of them.  

Once upon a time, I considered that the thousands, if not millions of three-leaf clovers were a blessing.  For the more of them there were, the higher the chances of finding the one four-leaf clover.

I believed.  I trusted an inner knowing.  

It was more of a promise whispered in my heart.  If I looked for it, it would be there.  It might take a long time, but I would go and find it before the lawn mower was done it's job.

I mused aloud.  My mother shook her head.  Attempting at discouraging such a thought.  

"You don't just go and find one.  And they are all three-leaf clover.  You know that."

I knew that, but I also knew something deeper.  

That my faith in that one clover was bigger than a worldly truth.

So I looked.  With the lawn mower gaining ground on it's already cut grass.  I started in the uncut portions.  I sat and looked at each clover one by one.  

I don't know how long I sat there.  I don't remember. 

But I do remember finding my four leaf clover.  The one I knew that was promised to me.  

My sass has never left me and I admit I was proud to prove my mom wrong.  That I found one and I knew it all along. 

She was floored.  She dropped what she was doing and called her mother, she recalled that story many times to anyone who would listen.  She celebrated with me.  Over this promise I found.

And that is the thing with our faith.  It just has to be bigger than what we already know.  

And when God whispers a promise in your ear, you don't gaff at it, you listen.  You let yourself fill up with excitement and you dare to believe that this incredulous faith is all it takes for that promise to be fulfilled.

There are promises that may not be fulfilled in our time, ones that create an ache in our spirits we are not capable of understanding.

What is important, is not that we see every promise / hope that we have fulfilled, but that we live our lives with a faith that is hope filled, joy filled and grace filled.  

This Clover, for me, is a symbol.  That when it comes to the dreams I hold within my heart, all I am being asked of is to have a Faith Like This

Birthday Rosé

Clarity.

There is something about this birthday, this year, this moment in time where I am stepping into a new clarity.  A clarity I haven't been able to grasp onto before.  This is different.

If anything 27 taught me, it was to make.  Make with abandon and without reason.  Good things come from making and clarity comes while one is in absolute abandon to their own inhibitions.  Deciding to write and produce 'The Mom Show' has delivered me into a new comprehension of my own skills, worth and passions.

28.  It's a year I feel called to be incredulous with my work and my reach.  I can clearly see the time in which I need to set aside to pour into projects and I can clearly see how my focus will not only bleed into my own joy and peace but also into the atmosphere around me.  

It is daunting to know that when I toasted 28 I was also welcoming in a new sense of 'limitlessness'.  The word of my 27th year has journeyed with me and now I have come to a new word.  

Claim.  Alongside Incredulous.  To believe that what I have been given, no matter how incredulous it may seem, has a life in this world.  Call it daring, call it wild, call it whatever you will.  

Whatever 'this' is, this is what I was made for.