Burn It Down: Women Writing About Anger | Lilly Dancyger

I found Lilly through her book of essays and memoirs about friendship. It was a beautiful book, so it made clear sense to me that I needed to read this collection of essays about anger. Each one does an incredible job of putting words to what so many of us women experience in life.

The Art of Feminism | Lucinda Gosling

Something about the political climate this International Women’s Day made me feel that this book was essential to get off the shelves while I could. In many respects, it feels as if an overreach to think I can’t just go and buy this or borrow it from the Library at any time, and yet - the way the world has tilted, it has felt as if the toxic patriarchy has a firm hold on what the future of women may be. I will never want to forget the future hope I felt and continue to hone.

Closer Together | Sophie Grégoire Trudeau

I have always appreciated Sophie's voice, and even more so now. She receives a lot of criticism for her privilege, but her self-awareness gives me room to understand this. She provides a space for women to express themselves in new and empowering ways. I am so glad I found this book as a woman and mother of a daughter.

The Circadian Code | Satchin Panda

Over the past year, I have enjoyed learning about and implementing the benefits of living by a circadian rhythm. Is it easy? No. It has been incredibly helpful to my sleep and overall mental health—1000%. This was just another read for me to glean more about the science behind why my body seems to respond well to rising with the sun.

Supercommunicators | Charles Duhigg

An enjoyable read on what it means to be a well-rounded communicator. Charles discusses the three main conversations within which communication happens: What is this really about? How do we feel? And who are we? Despite being trained in implicit and explicit communication, this book was a great reminder of what it means to be a communicator, which is ultimately a great listener. Something extremely hard to do.

Practices in Embodied Living | Hillary L. McBride

A workbook, a conversation piece, a book of reflections… Hillary gives us a book that cannot be read in one sitting. It is to be pondered, puttered, and processed over time. This book will remain on my shelf for years to come.

You Can Make This Place Beautiful | Maggie Smith

Quite simply, it is a beautiful read about a tricky subject. We can’t always know how life will evolve, but Maggie wonderfully shows that despite life’s unexpected, ugly turns, we can continue to grow into something beautiful.

The Situation and The Story | Vivian Gornick

A great compact book about the craft of writing and what it means to dig deeper into what you, the writer, are aiming to communicate. Quite simply, every book/narrative has a situation, and it has a story. Each writer should know what that is to serve the narrative well.

Water Borne | Dan Rubinstein

Read for our MFA pre-residency assignment, Dan Rubinstein gave talks and Q&As during our week-long residency. His book, funded by the Canada Council, documents his journey paddling around various areas of rivers, lakes, and canals in landlocked regions. If you like paddleboarding, this may be for you.

Somehow: Thoughts on Love | Anne Lamott

Anne Lamott is the family member I wish I had. Her honesty and reflections on life and love fuel me to be a better and more whole person with each word she writes.

House of Salt and Sorrows | Erin A. Craig

A creative adaptation of the fairy tale ‘The Twelve Dancing Princesses’. A story I loved as a child is made new through a manor by the sea, where a household of sisters dies accidentally one by one... A mystery, a moody aesthetic and a retelling all in one.

Personal reflections on the Winter 2025 Semester of the University of King's College Master's of Fine Arts Creative Non Fiction program.

Spending this much time deep in words and the craft of memoir essays is taking its toll. It’s lonely as much as it is healing.
This last year has been a beautiful battle between the lonely solo road and the side paths I find that bring solidarity, wonder and beautiful chaos into the journey.
I don’t know who I will find inside myself when I graduate and turn 37 next year - but whoever she is becoming...

She’s been writing a garden for herself, and maybe—just maybe—you’ll get to see it, too.

Onwards,

Personal reflections on the Winter 2025 Residency of the University of King's College Master's of Fine Arts Creative Non Fiction program.

Quiet Comfort Ultra Headphones | Bose

I caved. After years of my partner swearing by his noise-cancelling headphones and finally using his older set for meditation and high-focus writing, I figured it was time for me to invest in my own pair. If the only reason I bought these was to use them for focusing on my book writing and university assignments, they would be worth it. However, they have become a staple in my daily activities, even if only to help me reset my nervous system through a meditation playlist, etc.
*I invest in one item for my office or work life a year. This wasn’t the plan. But this usurped whatever it was going to be.

Palazzo Pant | Luluemon

I fell in love with these pants from Lululemon as soon as I laid eyes on them. The way they hug the waist and bum area while flaring out in comfort from there has me wanting to purchase more. Will pace myself. However, I can assure you that they are as comfortable and of high quality as they appear.
*I have paired it with Blazor and it serves.

Bubbly Soy Candle | Alben Lane

I have done my best to stop buying candles that are not locally produced or Canadian and not made with soy. I admit I have caved off and on, but Alben Lane makes it easy to keep to my values. Bubbly reminds me of the first time I purchased ‘Champagne Toast’ from Bath Body Works and currently sits on my desk during my birthday month, Mother’s Day and all the celebrations that May brings.

Holy Hurt by Hillary McBride | Hillary L. McBride

Hillary continues to write and create beautiful places for women and others who have grappled with what it means to recognize that one has been seperated from their mind, body and spirit and how to find alignment within all three without. This new book Holy Hurt is based on and a continuation of her podcast series Holy Hurt.

Orca Agate | Geologic in Toronto

Having a pre-teen who is deeply immersed in the hobby of collecting and learning about rocks and minerals, it seemed only right that we visit a store that sells and showcases a variety of stones, crystals, and rocks. My takeaway was this beautiful stone (mineral) from Madagascar, which resembles that of an Orca whale.

Slow Burn | Hobbry Puzzle at Indigo

I love supporting Hobbrys’ puzzles through Indigo. I don’t have the time to sit down and do one, but I do have the time to set one out and pick away at it over the months. This one was finished by a handful of preteens who puttered through my house. My daughter is the main culprit.

Charm Bracelet | Pandora

Admittedly, an indulgent gift to our pre-teen to celebrate her entry into the double digits. I had too much fun picking out her first three charms, which will hopefully be a fun experience for her to celebrate milestones and happenings in her life over the long term. I settled on her initial, a green gem to represent her birth month and an elephant to represent one of her most treasured items.
*I loved doing this for her so much, I realized that it’s I who wants a charm bracelet so bad—letting that desire sit until the new year.

Impossible á Aimer Vinyl by Coeur de Pirate | Bravo Musique

I don’t remember when I first heard Béatrice Mireille Martin, also known as Coeur De Pirate, but she was arresting from the first note. She marries old and new approaches to music within her vocals and style in a way that makes me weak in the knees.
Une Chanson Brisée is a favourite of mine.

Personal reflections on the Autumn 2024 Semester of the University of King's College Master's of Fine Arts Creative Non Fiction program.

As I work on writing a book of essays that touches on a variety of topics, least of all elements of trauma that still lives within my body I have found reminding myself of these approaches helps.
For more on how this broader nervous system works, Crash Course gives a great layman’s lesson.

1. Cold Shower

   It's not one I enjoy or am particularly good at—and yet, despite my lack of skills, this may be the best regulating method I have found to date. I am no professional at Cold showers or plunges, but when I have tried them, I have noticed the profound effects on my brain function and overall regulation.
   *On a small scale, holding ice cubes in one’s hand can help stop an anxiety attack and reorient the body.

2. Walk

   A daily walk for fresh air and movement calms the nerves. I like to say, “I never come back from a walk and regret it.” From time to time, I’ll also use my headphones and record myself processing a work or life issue—more often than not, by the time I have come back inside, I feel more regulated and have solved or brainstormed solutions.

3. Lap around the house

   This may seem ridiculous, but when I have been at my desk or sitting in my reading chair writing on something particularlly triggering or difficult to put into words, just getting up and puttering from room to room and putting something to order in each can help calm the buzzing of discomfort just enough for me to sit back down and write another page.
   *Movement always helps.

4. Meditation/visualizations

   Pop on your headphones and a meditative playlist (no lyrics or simply ocean waves), set a timer, and allow yourself to sink into your body and breath. Often, during this time, I like to ask myself, “Where am I?” and what usually happens is a beautiful spiritual visualization that feeds the soul. Five minutes before writing or starting the day has been a grounding, safe place for me.

5. A Calming Show

   The most prolific and thought-provoking television now tends to be highly deep and at best heavy to process. Finding something that brings one back into their body is a rare and beautiful thing. Examples of these are: Mr.Rogers ’ Neighbourhood, The French Chef, The Great British / Canadian Baking Shows, Best in Miniature, Gilmore Girls, Julia, etc.

6. A Regulating Playlist

   You’ll notice I add playlists to these suggestions because, as I have learned over the years, music and sound are hugely dysregulating or regulating. Using it to your benefit can be helpful. A lot of research has shown that 432 and 528 Hertz sound frequencies have a positive effect on the nervous system. You can find many of these online or on your streaming provider’s playlists.

7. Water

   Simple, understated, but amazing how it wakes one up and freshens the system. Water is proven to help one’s nerves communicate properly, regulate the body and overall brain function. A tall glass of water goes a long way.

8. Physical touch / cuddling with a safe person.

   My first memories of feeling safe were lying close to my mother during naps or other rest times, such as watching films. As an adult, I have found that same self-regulating feeling with only a handful of people. I currently feel this way most often when my daughter is near or my partner. We don’t need to be intertwined. It can simply be the way her pre-teen feet wiggle against my leg as she watches a movie or a show she likes. That physical touch creates a domino effect in my nervous system that cannot be replicated with just anyone.

9. Warm / Hot bath.

   Light some candles, put on a soothing playlist, add Epsom salts or a bath bomb, and allow yourself to be soothed by the warmth surrounding you. It’s hard to feel safe, but for a moment, the water wants to hold you, and you are enough.

10. The voice of a safe person

    Not all of us are privileged enough to live close to or see our safe people often. In lieu of touch and in person, the voice of someone can also help bring us back into a safe place within ourselves. I’d even go so far as to say that when my daughter hums and sings to herself while doing something, I will often lie or sit near her to be soothed by her sounds. I find her a very safe presence to be with and around.

It’s time you knew…

I am not just sitting through classes about writing… I am also writing a book of essays.

I can’t tell you the working title of this book (although if you pay attention, you may pick up on some of it).
I can’t tell you everything that will be included, but rest assured, if it made a mark on my life, odds are higher it will find its way in.
I can’t promise I won’t discuss the irony, the political, the upside-down religiosity of evangelicals, and the consistently overbearing patriarchy that has laced itself around me and so many of us like a corset.
Forcing our breath to become shallow,
our voices weak…and oh-

That’s how they keep us swooning like Victorian damsels ?!?!?!!!

I can’t promise a lot of things, but I can promise you that it will be a deeply provocative, if not also witty, read on the death-by-a-thousand-cuts moments women and other like-minded persons face in the world and the cultures that raise them.
I can promise that it will be a personal deep dive that sheds light on the importance and awareness of individuality, mental health and the quiet damage of an evangelical upbringing.

Onwards,


Amy Grace
An Accidental Feminist

Personal reflections on the Summer 2024 Residency of the University of King's College Master's of Fine Arts Creative Non Fiction program.

The Situation and the Story | Vivian Gornick

For those who are studying the craft of writing this book is essential. Pick it up. It own’t dissapoint.

Meander, Spiral, Explode | Jane Alison

A lovely book designed to help a writers brain break open and find all the possible ways in which narrative can find itself in a non linear format.

You’ve Changed | Pyae Moe Thet War

Despite the kickback against this book and it’s author regarding their privilege and placement in culture I found the break down essays on their name and the culture clash that they experienced with their name fascinating and beautifully written. Walking my own daughter through her middle names, why we chose them and her own identity crisis about them is eye opening and a privilege to behold. I think many people with names not based in an Anglo-Saxon linguistic while navigating a majority Anglo-Saxon demographic and world order structure will relate to this.

The Ten Thousand Doors of January | Alix E. Harrow

Complex, riveting and one of the most captivating reads I have had in a long time. Not worth spoiling, just read it.

A Court of Frost and Starlight | Sarah J Maas

A small bridge story between books in Sarah’s Court of Thorns and Roses series. A perfect read during the snow falls of January / February.

The Midnight Library | Matt Haig

I adored this read. It was not what I was expecting and.I found myself imagining what I would do if I was in my own midnight library. Truly a masterpiece.

Crown of Midnight | Sarah J. Maas

A distraction read during stressful times. Sarah J. Maas is becoming a comfort read.

Your Roots Cast a Shadow | Caroline Topperman

This book echoed into not only the current day that we are living now as I write this, but also into all of the spaces of my own heart and mind. As the first chapter states so well: “Our history, our roots is deeply planted. It’s vital that we not let these roots be wrneched from the ground, let alone used to clobber others.”
Hoe we anchor in to who we are and how we leverage that ‘identity’ causes impact, for the better or worse. Caroline doesn’t villanize, she sheds light. And we all know that light has a way of casting shadows.

Here in the Real World | Sara Pennypacker

A beautiful story about a boy who just wants his own bit of earth. In many ways - it reminds me of the summer-boy version of The Secret Garden. Both hurting souls looking to be seen by the land and company before them.

Pax | Sara Pennypacker

Sara weaves a tender and beautiful story between a young boy and his pet fox. Through the eyes of both the boy and the fox we learn of the pain and the joys of connection and what it means to be lost and finally, found.

A Curious Beginning | Deanna Raybourne

The first in the Veronica Speedwell Series. A much needed read to take a break from serious non fiction writing and reading for my masters. It helps that the heroine is a spicy independent victorian intellect.

Experiments in Imagining Otherwise | Lola Olufemi

Sometimes it’s enjoyable to just tip toe around words and see how they hit you. This was an expiermental read.

Your Spiritual Almanac | Joey Hulin

I adore this book as a friend during the year. I have finally reached the end of my full fiscal year journey with it and can safely say it will be with me for the end of time. I love books that give you monthly prompts to stay aware of the changing seasons. This book provides practical seasonal advice and knowledge like flowers and food that is in season but also helpful spiritual open ended thoughts to help connect the mind, body and spirit.

“I’ve learned not all threads belong…but the ones that do? I’ll be backstitching in.” - byamygrace

A Threads Project

Star Pillow | Indigo

Since Autumn, when I added a pumpkin pillow to our sectional couch for the giggles, we have realized that a cuddle pillow for the season is a fun additive for us all. Seeing this star pillow during a walk through Chapters / Indigo was a no-brainer for me for the winter season.

Complete Greek Myths by Usborne

Because we bought ourselves Mythos by Stephen Fry it felt apt that we picked up this visual version for our pre-teen.

Celine Dion | Lets Talk About Love Vinyl | Taz Records

With Celine coming back at the Paris Olympics, coupled with her latest documentary, I started to go back into my canon of music and realized I love her music even more now. Her passion, dedication, and quality of the craft are uniquely hers, surpassing her talent. I was eight years old in 1997, and these songs played in the malls, stores, radio, etc, which I believed helped define my childhood in the 90s.

Merit Lipsticks | Merit

I’ve been running out of lipstick lately. Something about the silky softness of Merits got me good.

Meditations by Marcus Aurelius

I picked this up to pick away at as I enjoyed Stoic philosophy last year.

Both Sides Now | CODA version

This winter I have been enjoying Joni Mitchell’s “Both Sides Now” in my winter playlist and also to play on the piano. This version from CODA is another rendition that hits the feels!

“Thank-you for being the threads that have held me together.” - Amy Grace
A Threads Project

“Even the most beautiful tapestry…is a mess behind it all. You are human..” - Amy Grace
A Threads Project

divine

adjective (diviner | dəˈvīnər |, divinest | dəˈvīnist |)

1 of, from, or like God or a god: heroes with divine powers | paintings of shipwrecks being prevented by divine intervention. • devoted to God; sacred: divine liturgy.

2 informal excellent; delightful: he had the most divine smile | that succulent clementine tasted divine.

The most provocative thing about life, is that it is consistently providing opportunities to evolve and unravel from the ways in which we have become entangled in constructs, concepts and ideologies.

This year, I am walking into a more embodied way of living, breathing and being. To embrace the word and concept divine to me is a physical, spiritual and metaphysical concept.

Over the years, I have been shedding the understanding of the patriarchal faith I was raised in and learning to lean into a holistic approach to spirituality. The Divine does not need to be divorced from the feminine, and the feminine in me does not need to hide from my masculinity. I can stand and breathe within these two elements, knowing that they exist in their states as all of these elements exist.

The Sun and The Moon.

The Day and the Night.

The Light and the Dark.

The Humanity and the Divinity

I am woman, I am fearless
I am sexy, I'm divine…

- Emmy Meli

Onwards,