This is important.  It's so easy to breeze past these thoughts and real life living because it's not as glitzy as the 'on the go', sexy snaps of #writerlife or #familylife.  It's the in-between.  The moments that are missed that give the fuller picture. 

Posted on Instagram:

"Here's the real...
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Nothing worth it comes easy & the juggle is real. It's a toddler table next to the work desk. It's the episode planning on a wall next to a box of play-dough. It's the full time mothering and running out to a meeting with the best partner in crime. It's the struggling with the fear & the pushing and pulling apart of the work. 
I am a full time mother. 
I am a full time writer. 
My brain is going in a million ways daily and I know that I was made for this. 
But the real is that I have had to let go of some wonderful things. I dance less, I miss out on events, I let people down just by trying to be both mother and writer. 
I wouldn't trade it. The exhausting days with a teething toddler & the evenings with glittering lights around my desk begging me to go meet my dreams. Walking to the park in the morning to be spirited and free and then driving out to a meeting to be badass and a bit edgy. 
Thankful for the spirits who come along side my wild and independence and give me the permission to explore, work hard and raise a wild soul. 
This is my real insane happy life."

And I am thankful.  

For the journey.
For the support around me.
For the inspirations.
For the experiences.
For the colleagues.

Staying feet planted on the ground and spirit reaching for the depths.  

It's no secret I spend many a week night at my desk. I have forever been an 'early morning' or 'evening' creative.  My thoughts are clearest after a workout or when the sun begins to set.  It's the way I have always been.  Naturally, as a writer, I capitalize on knowing this about myself.  

Five years ago I began what I call "Write Nights".  It started when I wrote my first play.  "The Chronicles of the Dramatics Society".  I knew I wanted to pursue the project and so I chose a few nights a week (At that specific time, I would go to 'Obladee' downtown) and write all evening.  That process was magical to me and really helped me understand the process of writing which worked best for me.  

My next project didn't get past the editing stage, but I began to enforce these "Write Nights" with any project onward that I would work on.  

Write Nights can start as early as 5pm but no later than 7:30pm and always end no earlier than 10pm.  If I am truly on a roll it edges close to 11pm.  But so often I find that even if I am on a roll I want to end on a high note and feel that creative surge in my veins when I leave the desk.  

They also always must consist of a beverage even if only water, but I adore it when wine or coffee is a possibility.  I light my 'writing candle' during the times I write and use a string of battery operated string lights from time to time.  

The sound track is essential.  Generally, the music I play must be in theme of my projects.  Currently that would mean a '1920s-1940s' Jazz playlist or a 'femme fatale' playlist.

Write Nights are my version of creative bliss and I however one finds their creative bliss / time, always elaborate on it and make it as alluring for your spirit as possible.  
 

I am coming into the realization that in order for me to focus on writing strong narratives and empowering scripts, means I have to humble the voice inside my own head, dream big and enjoy the journey. 

CONFESSIONAL
I am never not talking to myself.  I have an unending voice that rarely, if ever, quiets.  I chalk it up to being trained in simultaneous and consecutive interpreting.  Interpreters are taught to process all aspects of information, visual and audible in the moment it is being made, and also, retain that information for it's relevancy later within the same communication time frame.  

THIS MEANS
I am highly aware of my own and others emotions, perspective, and insights.  I am constantly struggling to let go of what I understood of others, myself and the world around me.  I am quick to be weighed down by myself and others and I find being in settings where I am unable to take a break from people extremely exhausting on my body, mind and soul.  

AS A WRITER
Embracing these sides of myself is what is going to push me forward into this next stage of my work.  I need to protect my work hours.  To follow my instinct on what will bring me focus.  To let go of trying to be all things to all people.  To have space enough to let my own personality fall to the floor as I write.  To let the fears of what others think of my work / life choices be just background noise to my main thinking process.

AT THE END OF THE DAY
This is my life.  My legacy.  My Joy.  Writing is my calling and if all I ever do is write scripts and have only a small audience for my work, than I believe I will have not only filled the calling, but will have lived a life that overflowed with joy for me and those who live with me. 

This Summer I am minimizing distractions and focusing in on two specific projects.  This means a lot of time at my desk and a lot of time learning formatting programs and editing skills.  

Both of these projects are women centred and focus on highlighting women through story, history and project creation.

I will be updating on my progress here and starting in July, monthly newsletters.

I am aiming to develop two specific pieces that bring multi-dimensional women to the spotlight and in one project specifically, to give a voice to how personality stereotypes limit our understanding of ourselves and others.  

Women supporting women isn't just a hashtag, it's a force to be reckoned with and I hope that as I bring life to these two pieces I will be able to align this work and myself with women who will breathe life into it and me.  

Heres to the ones who dream.